Cubans the good and the bad
I have been reading stories all over the net and it took me some time before sharing mine. Let's just say that i have been going to Cuba for a long time, I speak Spanish and I made a few friends "fren" along the way.
I know a few Canadian women who married Cuban men and they are here in Canada living happily their relationships are going strong even after 5 years. They have kids and houses, good jobs and they take care of their wives. I thought I knew what I was getting into, I never believed him 100%, always had doubts. I met him a few years ago, he was a singer in a hotel and he did not speak any French or English.
I fell for his charm. At that time my Cuban friends warned me that he was a ladies’ man, to be careful but I simply ignored this. After spending some time with him we finally got married (against my family my friends)
I went down to Cuba and did it all by myself. I had no one close to me other than his friends, his family. I was thinking that even if he was playing me at least I was helping him get out of a bad situation.
There was warning signs, all the bad luck seem to happen to him and for everything he needed money. I was in between jobs and simply could not afford to sponsor him and I could not get any help from my family. So I decided to get to know him more before doing anything. He always made me pay for his entry at a club (for which they do not pay), taxis were always twice the cost whenever I was with him. I knew of this of course at the time, but I wanted him to come clean so I did not say a word. He always wanted me to bring costly gifts; we would always stay at casa particular or hotels. When I was finally able to sponsor him he calls and says that he is going abroad to Turkey. I was mad and I got curious, searched on the web and found out that a German girl had spent some time with him, was in love and even met up with him in Turkey, well that was it. On Facebook I also found some pictures of him with his Cuban girlfriend and my mother in law. I stopped all sponsorship process. He then started pleading with me to forgive him (blah blah blah) I went over there in January of 2011, we discussed things and he told me that those relationships were over, that he loved me and that he wanted to come to Canada. I started the sponsorship process again. It was taking time, because I had already stopped the process they were examining my case more closely.
I went back in July, rented a casa and we spent time together trying to build the relationship. But I felt in my guts that it was all a lie, he was truly playing me. We never went out, I could not go to the hotel to see him sing, he did not kiss me in the same manner. Little details did not add up. I became suspicious of everything. He charmed me into believing that we could get a casa ask me if I could help by paying half the cost. Well I paid close to $2500 and I will never see that money again.
I decided to surprise him for the New Year and booked a flight for the 30th. I even had made some calls to ensure that I could be with him on the 31st where he sings.
At first he tells me that I cannot stay at our house, because “it is not legal”, he is working until the 3rd and it would complicate things if I show up at the hotel where he works. Then all hell broke loose, he proceeds to tell me that I did not do the paperwork, start a fight does not want to see me etc…
Well you know what, the next day I received a letter accepting my sponsorship, and I quickly called to stop everything, sent them a fax and even a letter.
I am not sending him any more money; he can do whatever he wants to pay for the divorce. I do not care, I have not cried once and I feel a great deal of relief.
I went on Facebook again and I saw that the Cuban girlfriend is now friends with my now ex mother-in law. So I guess they can now enjoy the casa. At least I was able to cut my losses short, what would have happened if I had gone through with the sponsorship. Good luck to them! I guess the only true thing he said to me was that he wanted to come to Canada.
I am still going on the 30th and booked a hotel. I plan to relax and enjoy myself. My only concern now is how to prevent him from doing this to another “Yuma” or to enter Canada