how do you know if your CUBANO is just using you

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how do you know if your CUBANO is just using you

by anne
(canada)

Has anyone tested their cuban boyfriend?

ANSWER by Vic Webmaster Havana-guide.com

Trust doesn't come overnight, you have to test your Cuban partner.

HOW?
Normally this is a long process that can take years. In your country do you marry the first one you met on the streets after two weeks? NO! Well it's the same in Cuba.
FIRST TEST:
Check his looks. Does he wears expensive clothing
(to Cuban standards) designer jeans, Nike shoes, a modern watch, cellphone?
Where does he get the money from to buy these things? Average jobs in Cuba pay 20-25 Cuc (dollar)...a pair of Nikes or Addidas cost 60-80 Cuc in Cuba. A paycard for a cellphone cost 10 CUC
(half a monthly salary in Cuba)
When he has alot of bling-bling he's probably a jinetero.
SECOND TEST:
Meet his family and see how they react, try to find out if he's not married. Some Cubans present their (Cuban) wife as their sister-in-law to a foreigner. A basic knowledge of Spanish is helpful to understand what they say about you.
Does he support his family? Will he ask you to support his family in the futur?
THIRD TEST:
Can you trust him with money? Does he recommend certain restaurants, bars, casa particulares? He probably get a fee for your clientele.
Leave your wallet unattended in your (casa) room with enough money (not too much). Check if he touched the money. Does he frequently need money for a sick child, mother etc.? This are classic scams in Cuba!
FOURTH TEST
How will your relationship evolve? Does he want to follow you to Canada? Just for the visa? Ask what his future plans are. Note, that several Cubans are homesick after one year. In case of a long distance relationship, there is always a risk that you will support him and his girlfriend in Cuba while you live without him in Canada.
FIFTH TEST
When you can afford it, go to Cuba and live together for a few months, half a year. This can be the acid proof for your relationship. How will he act in the every day life? Will he work? Will he treat you respectfully or leave you at home alone? The real life in Cuba is more difficult than two weeks vacations in a resort!
I learnt the hard way that trust in Cuba does not come easy, but don't blame the Cubans, it's the same in other countries.
Good Luck!
Love in Cuba

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how do you know if your CUBANO is just using you

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Nov 30, 2011
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play dumb + fake facebook
by: Anonymous

One of the best ways to find out what your Cubano is doing behind your back, is to not let on that you know even a single word of Spanish. I used this to great effect when listening to my Cubana and her mother talking in the next room.

Also, Facebook is a great tool. Maybe not so useful these days, since so many of them have figured it out and have their own profiles already, but if you are able to set up a fake Facebook profile in the name of your Cubano, just sit back and watch the friend requests come flying in. It's like a steaming dog turd on the path attracting flies. I found out so much with this method.

They'll probably find out after a while, but don't worry about that. Just keep it up for as long as you can. It helps to write as if you're an illiterate Cuban too - swap your b and v, c and s, comma and period, ? and !, mispell simple words etc.

Nov 30, 2011
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same old story
by: Anonymous

"I made the mistake of giving her my number & address, which she started calling every day after a few months away."

Well, at least you have already identified that you've made a mistake. Be warned, you'll soon be getting letters through the post, constant emails and phone calls in the middle of the night.

Just ignore her. Of course, then you'll be the asshole, you don't understand her, she doesn't understand you, you make her sad, she loves you, she's sorry. etc. etc. Set up email filters to just delete her emails, or you'll be tempted to reply. And make sure you have a phone that lets you divert certain numbers to voicemail - you'll need it.

Interestingly, they always seem to be able to find enough money to send an email or call your phone, when that method of communication facilitates them to get more stuff from you (laptop, new phone, clothes, MP3 player). Any other time, their phone is out of credit. You buy them credit, and it's gone within days.

Mine managed to use up 60CUC (special offer where double was credited to the account) after complaining about having none, and the little whore sent me a grand total of 2 messages from that. I suspect the other 58CUC went to her various other boyfriends.

Nov 28, 2011
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Avoid the trap
by: Anonymous

I went to veradero cuba for 2 weeks, got bored always staying at hotel & wandered to the local corner store where I made friends with the locals. A girl caught my eye & we hanged out a few times. At one point we slept together in one of the local "houses". Anyways, she already had a kid a few years old. During the downtime of sex she would say how wonderful it would be to knock on my door in Canada & surprise me. How she needed a laptop for her sons education & how she wanted me to bring her to Havana next time, that she needed asthma medication she even asked me to recharge her cell phone because its for her kid.

Anyways, I promised her all that & at the time I felt it was appropriate. However, once I had enough time to digest the situation & distance myself a bit, from the infatuation I realized that this woman was dangerous, possibly even a hustler. I made the mistake of giving her my number & address, which she started calling every day after a few months away.

Bottom line - The signs are there, dont think with your pants.

Aug 10, 2011
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Great Advice Vic
by: Anonymous

People should heed Vic's excellent advice, his words of wisdom will save you from much heartache and financial disaster.

Long distance romance can never work. They are incapable of fidelity and you will be expected to finance thir lazy lifesyle since you have been appointed his 'mujer'. If you fall for this you are being taken for a fool.

Learn Spanish this is the only way to know what they really are saying, thinking about you.

Strike up a friendship with the landlady of a casa close by to where he/she lives. Buy her a present, she will dish the dirt, she knows more about him than his own mother. He may have even dated her daughter, niece.

She will sing like a canary if you give her a botle of perfume, rum. You will be given the low down on his many illegitmate children, if the State are chasing him for unpaid maintenance.

Slip her 10 CUC and she will monitor his late night manouvers on her cellphone camera, her daughter will capture him in a clinch with a blonde Swede tourist at the disco or casa del a trova.

Believe me ladies this works, save yourself a heap of stress by having him followed. It costs little but saves your a lifetime of heartache and regret.

Only by doing a little detective work will you find out the reality of your romeo and if he is taking you to the cleaners, having a laugh at your expense.

May 04, 2011
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CUBANAS
by: Anonymous

Thank you that was very helpful....are there any males out there who have been played by a cubana do they operate the same way as cubanos?

May 04, 2011
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i married my cubana
by: Anonymous

Don't know what I was thinking I married my cubana I am 50 year old and she is 21 year old I married her after 6 months of meeting her and her family and now she is telling me she wants to have a baby, I am trying to bring her to canada. She seems so real, am I being played?

May 04, 2011
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BEST ADVICE ! Do not believe a word !
by: Anonymous

It is a given that all Cubans are using you and it is nearly impossible for you to tell as Fidel himself told Cubans tourists are to be used.

You must speak Spanish so that you understand everyone around you. Canadians are the biggest marks as we are so nice, we are so trusting.

Many Cubans when they know you are arriving put all their expensive stuff in the neighbors house and cry poverty so that you feel sorry for them and buy them things.

Many times when the nice Canadians return to see their Cuban lover the nice Canadian notice's things you already bought them are gone. When you ask, where is this or that, you get a very well prepared story. Like; someone broke into my home and stole my TV, stereo, my gold, everything.
Do not believe a word of it.

When I here some Cubana tell me that's my primo I quiver as 99.999% of the time it is the boyfriend. Bringing them back to Canada is a mistake you'll regret for a long long time, and it might cost you a fortune.

Here's my advice. Promise them everything and I mean everything, when you see them tell them it was in my suitcase and it's not there anymore, I must of been robbed. Or, I applied for the documents and they didn't arrive yet. Or I'll need to wait for my next years income tax return as the government needs it.

Turn the tables on these people and ENJOY the compliments, the love, the family get togethers, let them treat you like royalty and just keep promising them whatever.

Good luck Canadians and don't believe a word.

May 04, 2011
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Ottawa
by: Sylvie

Great advice as usual Vic.

I wish I had read your words of wisdom when I was seeing my now ex Cuban.

He was the epitome of charm and just romanced me to the hilt. He did not want to sign gthe register, but was tactile, and words of love just flowed from him. His email read like a love sonnet.

I trusted him. However when i returned and spotted the latest Nike and football shirt alarm bells rang. When he suggested a casa particular which I did not like, another alarm bell rang.

When he continually whinged about how hard up he was, how much hhis family needed to decorate, repair the kitchen etc etc. than I began to feel bored with him. He managed to wheedle all of of the contents of my suitcase out of me before I left, including my cellphone.

Lord how I regret that. He did not contact me for at least three months, to say he was 'thinking about me'.

I did not respond.

Anne be very careful.

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how do you know if your CUBANO is just using you

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how do you know if your CUBANO is just using you