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I trusted my Cuban Lover so much........

by Lina
(Sweden)

I am a young woman from Europe. This spring I've been in Cuba for 4,5 month.
The story:
After I had been there a while I met this beatiful beatiful man. He was like the answer to my prayers, at least I thought so! In the beginning everything was AMAZING, I was so happy - and he seemed very happy as well. He did everything to me, everything to make me feel good. I had never tried to be with a man that cared for me in this wonderful way. He told me all the time how special I was to him and how much he was dreaming about our future together. I felt we had something very special, we could talk about very personal stuff, something i've been missing in my other relationships. Several times he cried of happiness, in different situations, for example one day we were in the theatre another day at Malecon looking at the stars and also in other situations where we shared personal things from the past. Then the fairytale ends.......I find out that he has been lying to me about his past his former "career", that he has been trying to get permission to leave the country a bit before I met him (this doesn't matter to me, but what matters to me is that he lied and told me that he had never had a novia extranjera) Why didn't he just tell me the truth......
I also "borrowed" him money, and I think that he might saw this as a present. I've lost them. And now I can just see how he has tried scamming me with all these lies about who he were to make me "borrow" him money, or at least thats how I feel. Oh my God, how I would love to be clairvoyant or GOD to be able to see into his heart and mind to see whats going on. To me its just so unbelieveble that you can treat other people this way and f... up their hearts and minds like this. I just doesn't get it. This is very honest written and I hope you have understanding for my confusion. But it's simply because I'm so chocked by how some people can treat other people. I know that their situation is very difficult but still..... I broke up with him when I found out he had been lying to me. Then before I had to leave to my country he said that he had to see me and he came to La Habana. He had a surprise: He had gotten a big tatoo at the lower part of his arm saying my name and his name. And it was real, no doubt about it and very big. He wanted to show me he meant it and that he was serious, when I had to leave and we ended it "again" he cried and cried. Still I don't understand what has been going on in the mind of this guy. I'm still in love with him but I can't be with a man who I can't trust. I think it's so difficult which things you should forgive also because of the circumstances in Cuba. I mean I know he has been living an extremely hard life, with an absence of his parents in an early and this but still this doesn't justify him lying to me to make me want to "borrow" him money. I just think its so hard what to belief......When you really love the guy.....
What do you think? I'm so confused..... Should I just hold on to my decicion and try and forget him.....

Thank you for your time.

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Nov 05, 2015
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Jun 24, 2015
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Apologies from a Cuban NEW
by: Anonymous

Lina, i'm sorry, our society has gone to the breaking point where some people use feelings as leverage, move on you deserve better, make no attempts to get in touch with him again or he'll drag you, use you and discard you like yesterday news, as for the opinions that i've read i can agree to almost all of them, except for the words written by Carlito brigante, that kid is an ignorant, xenophobe, racist individual that mixed up support with a hate speech(please ignore him), and i wish you a full happy life with a person that truly loves you.

Sincerely
Un cubano mas

May 09, 2015
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by: Anonymous

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Feb 27, 2015
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by: Terry

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Dec 29, 2014
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Forget Him And Move On! NEW
by: Justin

Lina I am sorry to hear about the way which this guy treated you. It seems to be a game with them. They take us for mugs, walking ATM's.

Life is hard for many Cubans, and especially for Cubans who have grown up without a father in their life like your friend. Or Afro Cubans who are pushed to the bottom of the pile, have to work in the least lucrative jobs, cleaning etc. You will rarely see an Afro Cuban in politics, or medicine or science.

But that does not give them an excuse to rip us off play with our feelings.

I met a Cuban girl who seemed to be different, we met when I was on vacation and exchanged email addresses, we kept in touch. Se kept telling me she missed me, wanted to see me. I finally booked s flight back to Cuba and emailed her to tell her.

She gave me a list of clothing she wanted me to bring, which should have been a red flag. I still decided that she might be genuine and went there.

We spent some time together at a beach resort in Cayo Coco. But she seemed to be very selfish. When she was not eating all she wanted to do was watch t.v. There was little one to one communication

She also had a short temper and would shout if everything was not going her way.

We later met up in Camaguay where she lives. I visited her home, she is from a poor family. I bought food for them, she was dropping hints about how they needed to build another room so as to have a separate room for her brother. How the family would love a car etc.

She kept telling me how much she loved me. One night she went out alone to see her 'amigas' I felt a bit suspicious she got all dressed up, wore perfume. Her mother assured me she had no man in her life, that sometimes a colleague from her work would visit, but was just a 'colleague'.

When I arrived home to Toronto my pals told me to hire a private investigator to know if she was real or not.

I did not have to. The day after I arrived home I felt bad and had to visit my doctor who told me I had an STI. I called her she denied she had been with anyone. Said she felt uncomfortable with me telling her this, it was nothing to do with her. Must have been me I was the only man she had slept with etc.

She also told me that she was fine, had no symptoms whatsoever. Completely denied it.

Her reaction was more hurtful to me than her giving me the STI.

She was not only sleeping with someone else but she was lying to me, denying she had given it to me.

I would warn any man travelling to Cuba to wear protection, women as well. Especially with resort workers who have a very relaxed attitude to sex and promiscuity.

Lina you had a lucky escape, as I did. Think how much worse it would have been had you married that guy and spent a small fortune to get him to Sweden.

Good Luck!.

Sep 23, 2011
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Hard Lesson, but It is Right
by: Carlito Brigante

Now, you understand that you must marry guys from your own country? If you are Swedish, then you can only be happy with a Swedish man (or, in the worst case, Danish or Norwegian). Haha ha. All those Southern guys - Hispanics, Arabs, Turks, Africans - they view white Europeans as prey, not as human beings. I hope this incident will serve as a lesson to you. However if you don't listen to me, go on, date a Kurd, or a Chechen - there are many of them in your country. One day, these Muslims will rule your country, and you will have no one but yourselves to blame that you let those cockroaches enter your beautiful lands which your ancestors - from Vikings to Karl XII and so on - worked and fought hard to create. Sweden is a great country with good people (I mean Swedes of course, not immigrants); there is only one country in Europe which is greter than Sweden (guess which one)

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